February came and that was the first weekend that Luke came out here to visit me. Keep in mind that at this time, Luke was just a friend to me. A friend who was at this point, was more than just Joanna's brother. A really good friend, but still nothing more than that. I was thinking and praying about him being more than just that, but my thoughts hadn't gone further...yet.
I really hadn't put much thought into the fact that Luke would be coming to church with us on Sunday morning until Saturday night when I went to bed. Then it hit me full force--no one at church knew Luke and having him sitting with Dad and myself in church that next morning would for sure cause quite a stir! Why did I end up being so concerned over that? I don't know. I shouldn't have been because, yes, it did create a few questions, but I recall that morning going so smoothly that it reminded me once again, God is aware and in control of everything.
Later that evening, Luke and I took our cameras and went to the circus! What a fun time we had trying to get the best shots of flying trapeze people, show elephants, dogs and horses, and other performers. That weekend was spent with Luke and I talking quite a bit in addition to Dad as well, getting to know each other more and more. Monday came and Luke left that afternoon to head back to Colorado.
In the next couple of days Dad and I talked about Luke quite a bit and I slowly began to see that this just might work. This was really the first chance Dad had been given to spend some time visiting with Luke and getting to know him...his spiritual views, goals in life, views on various issues, etc. Dad's opinion means so much to me that when he approved of him, that made a huge difference in my mind and outlook on our relationship! A huge, exciting difference!
In fact, after that first visit, I really did begin to think this was a possibility and started getting a little excited about Luke. I saw excellent qualities and spiritual maturity and knowledge that were important to me. Just like what I had seen a year ago that sparked my interest in him on my last trip to Colorado Springs.
I was still uncertain, but began to think more and more that this just might work. It just might. One of the significant things that stood out to me that weekend was how smoothly things went while Luke was here. I had enough apprehension built up in me being concerned about that weekend and then to realize after the fact that it went smoothly?! I knew that was an answer to prayer and one that proved even more to me that God was in control and perhaps something deeper would develop with Luke.
In fact, after that first visit, I really did begin to think this was a possibility and started getting a little excited about Luke. I saw excellent qualities and spiritual maturity and knowledge that were important to me. Just like what I had seen a year ago that sparked my interest in him on my last trip to Colorado Springs.
I was still uncertain, but began to think more and more that this just might work. It just might. One of the significant things that stood out to me that weekend was how smoothly things went while Luke was here. I had enough apprehension built up in me being concerned about that weekend and then to realize after the fact that it went smoothly?! I knew that was an answer to prayer and one that proved even more to me that God was in control and perhaps something deeper would develop with Luke.
After that first trip Luke made out here, our emails between each other continued, but started to be much more frequent. And longer. And more detailed. Instead of just several in a two week period, it was several times a week or every other day. Which eventually led up to daily emails back and forth. As Luke would tell me later, he is just not that much of a writer! I never would have guessed! Especially considering the number of emails and length of those emails in my inbox with his return address!
Luke started coming out every month for a weekend. I looked forward to those visits, being with him and learning more and more about him, his goals in life and his relationship with the Lord. As April arrived, I began to realize that this was becoming serious. Not that I didn't take it seriously from the beginning, I did. My only purpose in agreeing to a relationship with Luke was for marriage. But I guess it finally dawned on me that this was a very real possibility and I needed to make a decision.
I could tell Luke's emails were changing and if I was still uncertain, then it was best for both of us not to continue. Was I ready to tell myself yes, this is someone who I can see spending the rest of my life with and continue to get to know him even more? Or no, I still just don't see any future relationship between us? If I wasn't sure, then I needed to decide that soon and inform Luke of that before things went any further.
I loved our email conversations back and forth because as I was pondering, debating and praying about our relationship, I could look back on our emails and reread and evaluate the things we shared several times. How well do you absorb something when you hear it? Or how better do you absorb it and remember it when you not only read it once, but several times? And I could reread our emails as many times as I needed to. And as one of my dear friends told me, "You will have a well documented relationship." :)
I loved our email conversations back and forth because as I was pondering, debating and praying about our relationship, I could look back on our emails and reread and evaluate the things we shared several times. How well do you absorb something when you hear it? Or how better do you absorb it and remember it when you not only read it once, but several times? And I could reread our emails as many times as I needed to. And as one of my dear friends told me, "You will have a well documented relationship." :)
Through the contents of the next multiple sets of long emails, I could see that God has been working in both of us over the last two years. That this really was the one person with whom I could spend the rest of my life. That this was that special person who I had been praying for years. That this was the Godly man that I could trust, support and confidently call my husband.
Once I had made that decision in my mind, that unrest and uncertainty dropped and I had such a sense of peace. And the fact that Dad agreed with me and approved of Luke made my decision final. Yes, I knew Luke would be the one at some point in the future. But I didn't know how that future would be much sooner than I expected....
Once I had made that decision in my mind, that unrest and uncertainty dropped and I had such a sense of peace. And the fact that Dad agreed with me and approved of Luke made my decision final. Yes, I knew Luke would be the one at some point in the future. But I didn't know how that future would be much sooner than I expected....
The month of May arrived and since my birthday was on a Sunday, Luke was determined to come out that weekend. He arrived Saturday evening after work just like he had with all his previous trips; his fourth visit out here to Kansas to see me. Also, Jena surprised me and arrived home that evening as well for my birthday!
Sunday morning came and Luke gave me one birthday gift to open before church. I opened a set of Christian fiction books which I would be excited about reading later, but as for that morning, my mind flew back to the Kid's Klub program I had planned in church, finishing last minute details on that and praying that all the kids would arrive that morning.
Sunday morning came and Luke gave me one birthday gift to open before church. I opened a set of Christian fiction books which I would be excited about reading later, but as for that morning, my mind flew back to the Kid's Klub program I had planned in church, finishing last minute details on that and praying that all the kids would arrive that morning.
Sunday school, church and the Kid's Klub program came and perfectly. As with every Sunday when Luke was there, I always received more comments, questions and hugs. This Sunday was no different except for the fact that it was my birthday. We went out to eat after church and came home and that's when Luke gave me my second birthday gift--a matching necklace and bracelet wrapped in glittery paper, which I opened and then we continued on with the rest of our day.
Luke and I headed downstairs to work with Photoshop and some photos on my computer. And Jena informed us that there was nothing to do in Kansas and she was bored, so she decided to make cupcakes. Partly because she had given me a cupcake recipe book for my birthday and mostly because after living in Oklahoma City for a year, she had now decided Kansas or rather where we were at in Kansas was rather uneventful. Didn't she know that she lived here for 20+ some years of her life?? Anyway, back to the story...
We finished working downstairs, Dad went to bed, Jena started frosting cupcakes and Luke and I started our late night talks. Usually when Luke comes out, we end up staying up late, talking. This night was no different. Sure, Jena was in the kitchen working on her cupcakes, washing dishes and cleaning up the kitchen, but that wasn't bothering either one of us. Well, let me rephrase that--it wasn't bothering me. Unknown to me, Luke was waiting for Jena to go to bed and she took FOREVER, according to him, to finish those cupcakes! Finally she said goodnight and headed to bed.
It seemed like an ordinary end to the day as usual when Luke was here. We continued talking for a little bit longer and as it was getting late, I made the comment that I really should go to bed. Then Luke informed me that he had one last birthday gift for me and asked me even though it was late, if I still wanted it now? Surprised, I said yes and waited for him to get up and go get it. Except he didn't. He still sat across from me and started talking and that's when I finally realized what he was saying and asking me to marry him! He totally surprised me!
I had already come to the conclusion that he was the one I was going to marry, but I really hadn't considered him proposing until months in the future. I was still absorbing the fact that God had brought someone into my life--I hadn't reached beyond that point yet. But of course, I said, "Yes!" to his very important and best birthday gift of the day! :) It was the best birthday I've ever had and the best gift Luke could have ever given me!
The next day we went shopping for an engagement ring, which was very fun and thrilling to be able to shop for a ring together. I was still trying to absorb the fact that Luke really did propose the night before and I really was engaged. But in the days and weeks since that day, I've fully come to realize that I really am getting married to a wonderful, Godly man! And how thrilled I am that God has blessed me so much in bringing Luke into my life. There's nothing quite as exciting as waiting until God's perfect timing in bringing that perfect person and seeing how He provides in every single little detail. As I look back in how Joanna and I met each other which later led to meeting Luke, I can see God working and preparing me for him even when I was totally unaware of it!
Yes, God had me wait for a while when it would have been my choice and my plan to be married years ago, but even through that, I can see God at work. Through those years of waiting, God taught me so much and there's nothing quite as fulfilling to see how God had a purpose in everything. Even through something as unexpected and tragic as Mom's death, I can see God teaching me to learn to be content right where He had placed me. And once I bended enough to obey His will and learn contentment there, He blesses me with one of my greatest desires! And not just in one way, but many ways! There's nothing quite as wonderful and joyful as waiting for God's best and being fully at peace knowing He is in control of everything!
May 21, 2011--yes, I can't wait for that very important day!! I love Luke so much and am looking forward to spending the rest of my life with him! Right now, I am very much looking to the future months of wedding planning and organizing in preparation for next May, but I still enjoy looking back over the last year. Remember our "well documented relationship?" Well, that statement is so very true.
Much of our relationship over the last twelve months is in those emails to each other and as of now, that email count is 1709! I love it! Every single email that consisted of one word, one sentence, one paragraph, one page or ten pages truly does tell our love story and in reading through those archives, we really have been watching God's plan unfold! What can be more wonderful than that?!